February 6, 2018

IWSG - a post about not writing

i'm tired of not writing. it's been a year since i worked on my novel. i haven't really been blogging. in both cases, i've tried. i've sat down, opened up my laptop, opened my Word program or Blogger, and then there's nothing. nada. zilch.

it feels like there's nothing in my brain worth putting in a story or a blog post. nothing worth really saying. that's sad and scary, because i love writing. even this post feels like a stretch and partly a waste of time. like i'm just venting and then sharing. "oh boy! what a great thing to post about."

but we're the Insecure Writers' Support Group. we can post about anything we want, as long as it fits the theme of helping other insecure writers. and let me tell you, i feel pretty qualified to share this. after a year of not writing, i'm a little insecure.

make that I'M VERY INSECURE.

but the other part of posting in this group, or at least how i feel about it, is to share something encouraging. i'm not sure that's going to happen today. that's kind of sad to me too. i started this blog a long time ago because i wanted to be encouraging. now i know that isn't always going to happen.

maybe this post is just here to say, "if you're not writing, i kind of know what you're going through--maybe not the exact circumstances, but i feel your frustration and pain. and maybe i have some things to share that i've learned in this year of not writing."

we're writers, but we don't always write. we miss a day, a week, a month. sometimes we don't write for a long time. but we're still writers. somewhere in us there is still something to say. we just don't know what it is.

we're writers, but sometimes we're afraid to write our stories or say what we need to say. we're probably afraid our writing is drivel or garbage. 

we're writers, but our worth IS NOT tied to how much we produce or what kind of response we get from what we write. we haven't failed. 

we're writers. sometimes we just write for ourselves and no one else. sometimes we can't even do that. we're still writers. 

we're writers. but we're also humans with messy lives. many of us have a family, a spouse, kids. maybe we have financial problems, health problems, marital problems. maybe we've gone through major surgery, lost family members, lost a job. maybe we're just tired of life. 

we're writers. sometimes we try to write to escape. sometimes we try to write and we can't. we're still writers.

well, in conclusion... it was pretty disjointed and rambling, but i wrote it and it felt really good to write and be an IWSG participant again. maybe someone read it. maybe someone was even encouraged. i don't think it was complete drivel. whatever the case, i'm still a writer. 


Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

I haven't written much of anything for almost two years, so in the same boat. But I do write and have written, so I'm still a writer. So are you.

Lee Lowery said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lee Lowery said...

Writers don't have to worry to much about what "other" people think of the writing process, because non-writer's don't have a clue. Carry on - we've got your back!

Natalie Aguirre said...

I lost my husband four years ago and had a reading and writing crisis that lasted years so I can totally relate. I didn't write for four years and didn't think I ever would again. I picked it up again this summer and am enjoying it. But because of my contract writing job and my new life, I can't write all the time and that's okay. Hopefully you'll find a middle ground too. Welcome to the group!

Mandy said...

I like what you wrote. It is encouraging. A reminder to not give up no matter how much we struggle. Thank you. :)

With Love,

Joylene Nowell Butler said...

I'm so sorry this has happened to you, Michelle. Over the course of my career it has happened to me three times that I remember, but probably more. One thing I've learned to is to be kind to myself and let whatever this is to just happen. Your prose will return. Take a deep breath and then another. Relax. Sit in the sun. Read a good book. Bake or paint rocks, or whatever. It doesn't matter. Just know it'll pass. There are no time limits on finding our muse.

Morgan Cartwright said...

I think your post is encouraging in telling people it's okay. I enjoyed reading it very much.
You are doing a good job.
Happy Wednesday!

Madeline Mora-Summonte said...

Don't you worry about it! That's what the IWSG is all about. Some months we do the encouraging while other months we need the encouraging. Hang in there! :)

Cathy said...

I've felt everything you posted about, and I read your post to the end, so it proves you have something to say, and you say it well.

Kristal Shaff said...

I've recently put a couple posts up on my blog. But I've decided that it isn't a writing blog. I think that is freeing. Just to talk about whatever is on your mind instead of making it a writing related blog. And doing so, still gets me to write.

And as far as writing goes... remember... one bite of the elephant at a time.